Yes, frustrationus maximus – I just made up the word. And, it is right.

So far, all I’ve managed to do is spend money and do a whole lot of work for nothing but criticisms about how the website is written and how it should be “perfessional” and how I shouldn’t use my name cricketdiane on anything because it sounds silly even if it is memorable and easy to find . . .

And. so far the only thing anybody wants to help me do is something for them like to look up something on the internet for them or about something that would help them do something totally unrelated. And, then if I say – how about helping me with this awhile – (after spending 3 – 4 hours doing something for them) – the answer is that they don’t know anything about it or criticisms while wasting my time arguing with me about it – and nothing gets done other than entertaining them with an argument.

No wonder people sell drugs to make money, engage in crime, start porn sites and do bizarre stuff . . .

Its because it is easier, faster and more understandable than doing something like I’m trying to do. Good grief, it pisses me off.

I’ve just spent an hour tonight with someone arguing with me over the word “this” and whether it has to have some sort of punctuation mark after it and before the phrase holding the email link…

That is not even right.

And, in the meantime – why am I even trying to do this? Even the people around me, friends, family – they don’t want to do it or to have anything to do with it, don’t understand it and haven’t even taken the time to read any of it. Is that indicative of the response that will happen all across America? That no matter if people have been out of work for two years and don’t have any real prospects of a job anytime soon, they won’t be interested in pulling with the community and rebuilding their economic opportunities from scratch? Are they going to keep waiting for some job to find them from online employment applications that aren’t ever seen in a nation where over 2.9 million jobs have been added but none of the companies with those jobs are hiring anyone for them?

Is everyone stuck on having to wait for an expert to come “fix it” for them? And, because they aren’t the “expert” in whatever might be required, they can’t bring themselves to the table with others and figure out what might work? I don’t get it. Don’t tell me America is like that . . .

I don’t even want to hear it.

That’s just sad.

It just can’t be. Do we really have to wait for the Chinese, or the Europeans or the South American companies to come make jobs for us? Or whoever? Are you kidding? Is that really the way it is?

Well, Damn.




And, damn again . .

Maybe the America the Beautiful Show project is too complex or too complicated – but it sure would help for people to read it before deciding and stop giving me critiques in the English language on it without even seeing the whole thing. That’s ridiculous.

And, its a waste of time.

All I need to know, (if that) – is whether it communicates effectively or not. And, I might need to know if there is anything else which needs to be included or explained in a more detailed way or from a different perspective to be complete.

That’s what might help. And to understand better how to let people know about it. Emailing the governors’ offices is very unlikely to do much good – and I’ve already done that. I doubt seriously that any of those emails will ever be read. They get too many as it is.

Very, very, very – frustrationus maximus . . .

and that is exactly the right word for it. If you own a Rolex watch and don’t want to hear what I have to say on my website because it isn’t “professional” – I probably am not saying anything that will help you much anyway so I’m just not going to worry about it anymore. And I think that if you are at the point just before or just after having to pawn or sell that Rolex watch in order to eat, to have a place to live, to make a car payment, to pay the house note or anything else like that – then the way I talk to you, isn’t going to matter – but what I say when I’m saying it, does.

Okay – I don’t feel any better now. That’s the truth of it.

Here’s what I’ve learned this far into the project – (as told to me by other people in my life so far) –

1. Most people are not going to want to do anything like that.

2. Most people are not going to read all that stuff.

3. It has to be fast, fast, fast and be told in three simple sentences or less for people to understand it.

4. It has to be professional for anyone to consider being any part of it or doing anything with it.

5. The name cricketdiane shouldn’t be used on anything.

6. Things should not be written the same way that I would talk in person – but worded carefully like an English textbook.

7. People don’t want things to be detailed and there is too much detailed information on the website.

And, yet – there may not be enough detail on the website. But let’s spend an hour arguing about whether the word, “this” should have some specific kind of punctuation mark after it, before completing the sentence with its email link after the word. Now there’s an entirely unproductive use of time, energy, effort and goodwill.

Maybe this is not the job for me. Anybody want to buy the America the Beautiful concept website and do this thing without me – because right this minute, I sure would sell the whole thing in a heartbeat.

– cricketdiane

(but don’t tell my mom and dad that I used my real name . . . )

Oh yeah – and I almost forgot the other two things I’ve been taught by the people around me so far –

1. according to my mom – nobody is to know we are related . . .


2. according to one of my friends – I shouldn’t be doing this the way I’m doing it, but rather make some small show locally myself and then see if it works – then do another one maybe next year or the year after or see if somebody wants to do a little bigger one nearby.

— and then he explained how I needed an art show group to help me put together the America the Beautiful Show . . .

He really should’ve read about it on the website before “helping” by explaining that.

Why don’t I just finish saying it –

This show is about economic community development. It isn’t actually a “show” at all, yet. It is just a website. There are things listed to buy that actually – can’t be purchased on the site – yet. There are possible places for advertisements and sponsors to help support the website – but there aren’t any yet. And, if I were to get some advertisers right now, I’m not really sure what I would need to do.

They probably feel just about the same way about me, too. Potential advertisers and business sponsors probably wouldn’t know if this will work, and whether it will have any traffic or appeal to the people they want as customers. I don’t know either. I have a pretty good idea that once people do know about it, the information and the concept will draw people that would be appropriate audiences for many different products, services and businesses – but I don’t have any proof of that right now beyond my common sense about it. But it isn’t anything except a great idea that needs doing right now. And, I’m doing it as best as I know how to do it because I don’t see anybody else doing it and it needs doing.

It drives me to distraction, though – to have such bizarre comments and interactions which don’t make any good sense at all. It seems like these people would’ve at least taken the time to look at the website and its content before rendering decisions, judgments, advice, nonsense, criticisms, dictums, arguments, attacks, detractions and distractions. You couldn’t begin to imagine how many of these conversations have already gone on between me and family members and friends inside of the last two weeks since I’ve put this thing together. And, the rest of the world isn’t even in the middle of it yet. I’ll never make it.

I’ve had arguments about professionalism. I’ve had arguments over using my name. I’ve had arguments over what “most people” and “average people’ will or won’t do. I’ve had discussions about whether I should be doing it or not. I’ve had arguments over whether it should be done at all. I’ve had arguments and criticisms over all of it. I’ve had arguments and criticisms over my ability to do any business successfully whatsoever – ever. And, I’ve had arguments, criticisms and rejection without ever leaving the gate yet. I haven’t even had to fly to New York to get told it won’t work. I got to hear that over the phone before even getting out into the world with any of it. And, my family told me not to tell anybody that they know me or that I know them – already and I haven’t even taken out a business loan or advertised the durn site yet . . .

Well, isn’t that special.

I could’ve run off to the beach – but no. I’m going to help America . . . I’m going to build a business…

What was I thinking?

Just another stupid idea.

– cricketdiane