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2008 Cricket Diane C “Sparky” Phillips
I know we’ve all heard the stories, of the deputies coming to the house as a result of these foreclosures being served, hearing shots ring out from the home to find the homeowner gone forever, gun still in hand.
What could I say that would save even one life from this course of action? But, that if I knew, would it ever be heard in time to make a difference?
If I were there in person which I have been on some occasions like this, I would say:
1. “Hey, don’t waste those expensive bullets and make a durn mess I’ve gotta clean up when you’re done.”
2. “You do know there is no taxi service back, if you change your mind and don’t like it being dead?”
3. “You haven’t got one problem that money won’t solve. You’re always making money at stuff, what is the problem?”
4. “Yes, you’re right. It does suck, it isn’t fair, it isn’t right and it damn sure must be serious if you would give up the only thing you actually do own – you know, we can’t make another one like you, right?”
5. “You do know – dead might be like on that movie Beetlejuice, you know – quit laughing – that ain’t funny.”
And that’s usually about all it takes – then we can “talk” and I can listen.
I do listen as if there is not one other thing in the entire Universe more important than this – no matter what it is & no matter how long it takes – I do not use foolish repeating crap from what is said to get them to talk more. That is bull and the person I’m with is more valuable than that.
What this person was willing to give away the only thing precious in the Universe over, I want to know. They must be right – it must be that serious because they have already stated that level and degree of seriousness about it by their actions.
All I need to know is why they believe it to be so – not to argue, though sometimes I do, not to debate, not to win, not even to save their ass. I want to know because they may be right and theirs is a menu of options that only includes one.
I do approach it differently cause first, I’m not going to fix “their” emotional well-being, that is not my job – that is their own job.
Second, if this is the first time they’ve had something taken away they worked for, been disappointed or rejects or failed or whatever, I want to know cause that is a thing that threw all of us at least a time or two.
Third, I do know that options of responses to shit happening and this person being right about it are multiple, not singular. By the time anyone has only one option left on the menu (having to do with severely disabling permanent, long-term solutions to short term problems) [like suicide] –> that person needs a new menu & they are limitless.